Around Here

My friend Robert , from Washington, was here for a few days to visit his mother. We were planning to go kayaking but the launch at his mother’s enclave was under construction. Undaunted, and still in the  mood for an outing, we decided to bike the Black Island trail at Lovers Key. The island was named after Black Augustus, a pirate who was captured but later escaped, making Black Island his home. All along the trail we heard the mournful bellowing of an alligator deep in the swamp.  Black Augustus' ghost. Local legend has it that his treasure is still buried there. We didn’t find it. So we went to the beach, to practice living well on next to nothing...

I was on my way into the city today when I began to notice a line of congestion on the opposite side of the median, heading back the other way. I congratulated myself for driving in the direction I was going. But what appeared to be a routine slow-down started to look more ominous as I neared US 41. Cars were still bumper-to-bumper, and had been inching along, for the entire four mile stretch. As I neared the intersection, I could see a traffic cop at the crossroads ahead stopping cars from turning right, south, in the direction of Coconut Point mall, my destination. He was forcing them north, or else into a U-turn and back down the road they had just come up. So that was what the congestion was all about. Still a couple of blocks from the intersection, and thinking I’d outsmart the traffic, I made a right turn down a side street. I thought I could catch a right-hand turn on 41 a block or two farther south. Delusion, especially when associated with self- congratulation, can be comforti...

Only a few thousand things. Is there anything more over-hyped and overrated than sex? I think it’s mass Pavlovian conditioning, promulgated by the advertising industry. Can't live with it, can't live without it. Sigh. But I can think of hundreds of things more enjoyable, less messy, and less of a letdown, with scarcely even trying... a Mozart piano concerto a kiss an acid trip Pad Thai a dip in the ocean at Lido Key beach lying around all day at Lido Key beach first night in a great metropolis a bottle of 1980 Bordeau Blanc The Cyclone at Coney Island swaying in a hammock under a frangipani in bloom friendship foreplay feel free to jump in any time...

We’re having a late-season warm spell. Which gives me a few more days, or maybe a little longer, to ride around on my scooter with my shirt off. I was out today and a couple out of some romantic comedy pulled over to put the top down on their Mustang. They honked as I rode by. My scooter-beep brought a wave and a shriek from Amanda and a fist up from Channing. A last hurrah. Autumn around here is a slow drift into a Canadian summer. My only joy is that we still have a couple more months before the snowbirds descend, with their noise, their road rage, beach-busting, and viruses. And money to spend. Me, I’d like to head further south come Christmas, with a couple of playmates, til spring. Crooked Island, maybe. Never heard of it? Exactly. I awoke this morning from a disturbing dream. I was in a boat at the marina when a huge storm, dreadful forty-foot waves, began rolling in. Much chaos, battening down, scrambling, ensued. And getting packed up to move to higher ground. This was a foresh...

My brother was here with his girlfriend for a time. He has his own condo in the building and shows up for a week, a month, when the spirit moves him, when his airline has a deal he can’t pass up. He regularly flies down and back for as little as fifteen dollars, round trip. I don’t know how he does it. I passed it off as idle boasting until he showed me the printout. There it was: DTW to RSF and back again. Fifteen dollars. We watch a lot of movies when he’s here, and go out for Chinese, for ribs, for breakfast. For a while we stopped exchanging DVDs after I got miffed at his taking umbrage with my lending a movie to my neighbor Fran that he’d to lent me, even though he had just finished watching one that she'd lent to me that I'd lent to him. Siblings have complex resentments and rules of engagement. Movie night is at Chez Jeaux since I acquired the big flat-screen TV. Generally accompanied by snacks by Jack. We had pizza for Palmetto and Adaptation, fried chicken for What Abo...